


A Potion for success (or complete chaos)

by DieroteRosine



Series: Kuroo Week 2020 [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!, Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Akaashi Keiji Is So Done, Alternate Universe - Harry Potter Setting, Alternate Universe - Hogwarts, Cheating in a Match, Day 1: Uniforms, He just wants Slytherin to win the House Cup, Hijinks & Shenanigans, Hogwarts Quidditch Final, Kuroo and Bokuto are Quidditch-Player, M/M, Potions, Rulebreaking, Slytherin Kuroo and Bokuto, Uniforms, kuroo week 2020
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-17
Updated: 2020-08-17
Packaged: 2021-03-06 07:34:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,172
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25949662
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DieroteRosine/pseuds/DieroteRosine
Summary: "You already know that this is a serious violation of the rules and that could mean that you both get kicked off the team?"Played shocked, both boys put their hands over their mouths and Kuroo smirked: “Us? Getting kicked off? The best beater and the fastest chaser of the entire school? "Bokuto added: "Besides, you can't throw someone out if you don't know who it was."If Akaashi had got a galleon every time he heard this sentence from Bokuto or Kuroo and they were of course caught afterwards, Akaashi would've been a rich man by now.________The Hogwarts Quidditch Finale is coming up, Kuroo and Bokuto trying their luck with potions and all Akaashi wants is to win the House Cup - a recipe for disaster.
Relationships: Bokuto Koutarou & Kuroo Tetsurou, Bokuto Koutarou/Kuroo Tetsurou
Series: Kuroo Week 2020 [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1883374
Comments: 2
Kudos: 45
Collections: Kuroo Week 2020





	A Potion for success (or complete chaos)

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome to Day 1 of this year's Kuroo Week.
> 
> As a non-native Speaker I'd like to excuse minor spelling mistakes, but now have fun :)

Quiet giggles echoed through the hallways leading to the Slytherin common room and Akaashi stepped around the corner at the precise moment when Kuroo and Bokuto pulled their heads out of the seething cauldron and highfived each other.  
The black-haired Slytherin raised an eyebrow questioningly as he watched his two house mates in silence as they giggled manically, not aware of his presence, beginning to fill the potion into small vials.  
  
A few potion drops got onto Bokuto's cloak and almost immediately the long green-silvery-black robe turned into the unmistakable red-gold combination of Gryffindor and Bokuto chuckled happily.  
Kuroo pulled his sleeves further over his arms and looked very much like Professor Snape, the black messy hair covering his forehead and all you could see were his excited glittering golden eyes.  
  
After a few minutes, in which Akaashi had just leaned against the wall and watched the duo fill a few bottles with a suppressed giggle, the youngest of the group cleared his throat loudly.  
Startled, Bokuto dropped his current vial, which disappeared into their kettle with a satisfying "plopp" and produced a greenish cloud of smoke.  
Both students turned around with wide eyes and Kuroo huffed, apparently relieved to have only Akaashi in front of him and not one of the house prefects.  
Since the last explosion in the great hall, which had rained a fountain of slime on all the students, Bokuto and Kuroo avoided the prefects as if they had dragonpox.  
  
“By Merlin, Akaashi! You can't just sneak up on us like that! I almost turned Bo into a teapot!", The boy groaned and Akaashi raised an eyebrow in amusement.  
“As if you could've done it at all. If I remember correctly you never got a better grade than “acceptable” in Transfiguration, right?”  
Kuroo rolled his eyes theatrically and mimicked Akaashi with his hand. "Oh, I'm Akaashi and I have an 'Outstanding' in Transfiguration, look at me."  
Akaashi smiled compassionately at his good friend and it was Bokuto of all people who stabbed him in the back. “But Kuroo is an ace at Potions! Professor Snape even said he's the pride of the entire course."  
  
Kuroo gave Akaashi a smug grin before he became aware of the still uncorked vial in his hand.  
"Speaking of potions, Akaashi, look what we stirred up during the last break."  
  
With a dissolute movement Kuroo stepped aside and gave way to Akaashi so that he could take a look into the seething cauldron in front of his two friends.  
Poison green liquid with small red spots in between bubbled happily towards him and an acrid smell rose to his nose.  
  
Akaashi wrinkled his nose in disgust and asked the two boys next to him skeptically: "What in Merlin's beard is that?"  
  
"That-", Bokuto snapped at one of his glasses, "is the win for our next Quidditch game."  
  
"Oh no, not _that_ again." Akaashi muttered, but before he could escape Bokuto's long and euphoric explanations, the man with the owl hairstyle had already trapped him in one of his muscular arms and started to talk excitedly.  
“It will be an absolute breeze! Ku copied the potion from Professor Dippet's book and then perfected it.” A confident grin from the black-haired man.  
"With this little baby right here we're able to confuse Gryffindor so much, that they won't even know what's happening to them."

“You know-”, Kuroo grinned, “the potion ensures, as you may see with Bo, that the color of our uniforms changes for a short period of time. And if we inconspicuously spray a few drops on the uniforms of the Gryffindor players on the day of the game ..."  
  
Akaashi interrupted him with an abrupt wave of the hand and massaged his temples. "Hold on. You want to make sure that they can't tell the difference between the two teams and that it becomes more difficult for them to see their own team in the air, right?"  
The beaming grin of the two Slytherins was enough to make Akaashi sigh.  
"You already know that this is a serious violation of the rules and that could mean that you both get kicked off the team?"  
  
Played shocked, both boys put their hands over their mouths and Kuroo smirked: “Us? Getting kicked off? The best beater and the fastest chaser of the entire school? "  
Bokuto added: "Besides, you can't throw someone out if you don't know who it was."  
  
If Akaashi had got a galleon every time he heard this sentence from Bokuto or Kuroo and they were of course caught afterwards, Akaashi would've been a rich man by now.  
  
Accordingly, he eyed the bubbling liquid with one hand over his nose to protect it from the pungent smell and accepted the fact that both of his friends would probably be the ruin for Slytherins house points.  
  
Even Tsukishima as Kuroo's beater colleague or Oikawa as the team's top seeker couldn't save anything.  
Neither of them had ever had the ability to stop either of the two slobs from doing anything as insane as attempting to cheat in the school's Quidditch finals.  
Unfortunately, Kuroo and Bokuto only listened to one person - and that was the other one.  
  
But since the two stuck together like an outgrowth, trouble was already inevitable and it was mostly the House of Slytherin that had to show only a double-digit score at the end of the year - often 90% of the lost points were due to the two idiots.  
Not even Gryffindor's Hinata and Kageyama or their beater / keeper duo Tanaka and Nishinoya got caught doing pranks or stupid ideas as often as Kuroo and Bokuto.  
  
Behind the back of the unequal pair, bets were already running on how many points they would lose next time and which teacher would get them.  
This time the chances were standing not bad that Dumbledore would personally witness their crazy ideas.  
  
Akaashi sighed and ignored the euphoric whispers of the two Quidditch players, he knew that the potion would cause a disaster and when the time came, Akaashi would be somewhere in the stands and would deny ever knowing these two.

The fanfares rang over their heads, gold-red and silver-green flags fluttered through the air and the voices of hundreds of excited students echoed in the stands.  
  
Akaashi snaked to his seat near the stairs, where Konoha and Semi were waving to him, both loaded with popcorn bags and something that looked suspiciously like butterbeer.  
However the two had managed to smuggle the alcohol past the teachers, Akaashi didn't question it and sat down next to his two friends on the bench.  
  
Semi's cheeks were sprinkled all over with green glitter paint and the young man grinned broadly when he smeared a few streaks of green paint onto Akaashi's face as a greeting.  
Coughing up glitter, Akaashi ducked under a second load and punched the other Slytherin in the shoulder instead.  
  
"This is going to be so much fun!" beamed Semi, his entire body was wrapped in a huge Slytherin flag and small snakes in enchanted tattoos snaked over his arms, while Konoha nodded.  
"Our team prepared the whole year for this showdown and if they manage to beat Gryffindor with thirty points ahead, we finally got the House cup.”  
  
Akaashi avoided saying anything, the memory of the potion in the small vials was still too fresh to ignore and the closer the game start got and the louder the chants in the stands became, the more Akaashi had the feeling of Slytherin to counteract a great embarrassment.  
  
The doors of the respective towers flew open with a loud bang and before Akaashi could even think about the potion, the players of the two teams rushed onto the field to loud roars and cheers.  
  
First and foremost the two team captains - Oikawa, whose female fans went into high-pitched screams when the young man showed his typical peace sign to the crowd, and Iwaizumi, who watched Oikawa shaking his head and, as always, looked stunning in his gold-red Gryffindor robe.  
"That's really the only thing I envy Gryffindor for." Konoha muttered next to Akaashi and Semi agreed. “Iwaizumi-san is such a great team captain. And we? We have Oikawa. "  
  
Akaashi laughed together with Semi and let his gaze wander searchingly across the square, his eyes narrowed slightly until he spotted Bokuto and Kuroo.  
The two players floated noticeably close together in the air and even if it was only a tiny movement, Akaashi saw the moment when Kuroo handed the vial with the potion over to Bokuto.  
  
Sighing, he leaned back and buried his face in his hands, elegantly ignoring Konoha's question "if everything would be OK" because if he had to answer honestly, nothing would be okay.  
He wondered if Kuroo and Bokuto had considered in their brilliant plan to let their team know about their idea so that they wouldn't be as confused as the Gryffindor players afterwards.

But any further thoughts faded into the background as Madame Hooch stepped onto the square and Oikawa and Iwaizumi floated next to each other on the ground to shake hands.  
  
From where he was sitting, Akaashi could see that Oikawa was blowing a mocking kiss to Iwaizumi, who was returning it with a grunt. It was an open secret that the two captains were on a more than friendly relationship with each other and often settled their disputes on the Quidditch pitch.  
  
Madame Hooch began to explain in her usual loud voice that she wanted to see “a nice fair game” and Akaashi could swear to see Kuroo and Bokuto wiggle their eyebrows.  
Shortly before the game started, Kuroo kissed Bokuto on the cheek, clearly visible in front of everyone in the stands, and then all fourteen players whistled across the field until they waited like hungry animals for the Quaffle to be thrown.  
  
As soon as the ball left Madame Hooch's arms, the hunt for the points began and Oikawa and Gryffindor's seeker Hinata dashed into the air, always looking for the little golden ball that would let them win the game.  
Minutes of the game passed without anything exciting, Iwaizumi scored two goals, much to the annoyance of Slytherin's keeper Yaku and Nishinoya, who was guarding the rings on Gryffindor's side, let in a ball from Futakuchi.  
  
Akaashi saw the first change just as Gryffindor's chaser Ushijima whizzed past Bokuto and dodged a Bludger beaten by Tsukishima.  
  
At first it was only a small corner, but soon Ushijima's entire Quidditch uniform turned green and when Kageyama tried to pass him a ball, he visibly stopped, time enough for Kuroo to almost knock him off the broom with a bludger.  
The next to be caught was Tanaka, who along with Yamamoto, made Bokuto's, Tendou's and Futakuchi's life difficult with the Bludgers.  
  
Yamamoto almost shot at his own teammate when Tanaka's robe suddenly lit up in the colors of Slytherin and once again Kuroo took the chance and played the Quaffle to Bokuto, who immediately turned it into a goal.  
  
Akaashi stared between his fingers at the chaos that was unfolding over them and as more and more Gryffindor players appeared in green, the background noise around them also grew louder.  
  
The first boos were heard from the Gryffindor grandstand when a gold-red Tsukishima suddenly came into Akaashi's field of vision, who was just able to avoid one of Kuroo's bludgers.  
"HEY!" One heard the blonde roar and Akaashi closed his eyes in pure agony.  
As expected, one of the two idiots had not paid attention and sprinkled one of their own teammates and now not only green Gryffindors, but also golden-red Slytherins flew over the square and there was only chaos.  
  
When Oikawa bursted into the crowd at a great pace, Hinata hot on his heels and both of them suddenly wore a red robe, the audience lost their nerve.  
  
Yaku in his rings stared wide-eyed at the field, unable to recognize which of the people belonged to him and Futakuchi accidentally tossed the ball to Ushijima, who simply stopped, holding the Quaffle in the middle of the field and didn't move an inch.  
  
But if Akaashi had learned one thing at Quidditch, it was - the game wasn't over until the Snitch was caught. No teacher would interrupt the game and so the two teams “played” for five more minutes before Hinata caught the snitch and what was probably the most confusing Quidditch game of all time came to an end.  
  
Defeated, the Slytherins shuffled off the field, still arguing wildly what had just happened and Akaashi had just decided that he had never heard the names “Kuroo” or “Bokuto” in his whole life.  
  
Akaashi was no longer surprised that the two of them were drilled in Dumbledore's office shortly afterwards and that Slytherin's score was 100 points lower the next morning.  
  
And when he ran into Bokuto and Kuroo two days later, cuddled together over a potions book and whispering conspiratorially, Akaashi just sighed deeply, raised his wand and mumbled:  
  
_"Petrificus Totalus."_


End file.
